Say Cheese!



We took advantage of a beautiful day yesterday to make a visit to the Cherry Blossom Festival in a nearby park. I love walking around looking at all the beautiful blossoms and basking in the glow of spring blooming everywhere. It was peaceful......well as peaceful as a park full of a few hundred people can be :-) But there aren't too many place in China where you can find peace and solitude at the same time so we take what we can get.



Recently my adorable and very opinionated daughter and I had a conversation that went something like this:

Mommy: Maddie what are you drawing?
Maddie: These are 2 boys! I like boys!
Mommy: Oh good me too :-)
Maddie: But I don't like Chinese people
mommy: What? Why would you say that?
Maddie: They're too Chinesey

We discussed this for a while longer and it boiled down to the fact that she is insulted that she can't understand anyone who talks to her. Since she is blonde and white skinned, she attracts attention wherever we go. Random people constantly want to talk to her or touch her. When she was very little she enjoyed the attention, but as her English language skills have taken off, she has been increasingly insulted by the fact that she can't understand or be understood by all the random people wanting her attention. Robbie went through the exact same thing at this age and now that his Chinese has taken off he is confident and comfortable. I'm sure as her language improves her comfort level will go along with it.



So I'm sure you can imagine how much she enjoyed all of the random people at the park just dying for a photo of her or a smile in their direction. My general rule to help in these situations is to tell people that they are welcomed to photograph her from a distance as long as they don't interrupt her play or try to make her pose for their photo. Of course not everyone is convinced by my warnings and inevitably they get the evil eye from her if they do dare approach. She has become adept at stonewalling people who try to make her pose for photos. We are trying to teach her to say hello and then walk away but that's a while off I think :-)




Rob bought the kids some bubble swords and we started blowing bubbles in an empty patch of grass. One by one they came.....our faithful admirers. First just one or two, then slowly a crowd gathered round us, all snapping photos like we were the coolest thing since sliced bread. The lady in the pagoda singing to make some money, lost her crowd to us. She started looking a little unhappy and the crowd was getting a little oppressive so we decided to move on. One person quickly approached to ask for our photo, and a line quickly formed behind them of other people hoping for a chance at a photo. We politely declined and did our best to disappear as quickly as possible.




When we paused in a more secluded section of the park to snap a family photo, a random Chinese grandfather walked right up to me and handed me his grandchild while his wife quickly took the opportunity to snap a photo of the poor stunned child with the western family. It took me so much by surprise that I just had to laugh and smile.





A friend asked me if the crowds staring or trying to get our photos had ruined our day. But I replied that it always reminds me to be thankful that the general populous here is so very friendly. I would much rather deal with friendly curious people wanting a picture than hostile or jaded people who find our presence an annoyance or a threat. The people in our province are genuinely friendly and hospitable and have always been willing to suffer through my bad Chinese and give me directions or help when needed. So if that means we have to deal with a few extra photos and lots of stares, I'll take it. Maddie doesn't agree with me yet, but I think she'll come around soon :-) And since they shamelessly photograph me I don't feel too badly photographing them either!






Comments

  1. umm, what is that last photo???? ridiculous!

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  2. It's funny that you posted on this. We had the annual elementary trip to Lao Shan today and early in the hike I spotted people snapping photos. One of the girls in my little group ducked her face when a stranger tried to get a picture during one of our own group photos, and she told me her mother doesn't like to have strangers take her daughter's photo. I could kind of understand (I'm pretty used to it myself but it weirds me out a little with kids - "minors," but that's not a concept here the way it is litigation-wise in the US), but I didn't know how to handle it so I asked a Chinese co-worker who was with us what to say to the people. We used the parent thing as the explanation/excuse next time someone was asking/trying to take a photo of the kids, with a "bu hao yi si" thrown in for good measure, and then the other foreign teacher (Angela) happily took a photo with the wanna-be photographer's confused little granddaughter instead :) In fact, when she saw a couple with matching outfits Angela reversed it, asking to let her get a photo with them! LOL.

    I really appreciate your perspective on it, that it's MUCH better than having people be unfriendly or even hostile. Why not "feel like a rock star" as Angela put it? :) I'm glad you figured out the root of Maddy's feelings. I hope she gets used to it sooner rather than later but I know I would have been right with her as a kid; it took me long enough to get used to the stares, and I was 25 when I moved here!
    ~Lily

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  3. Well bah humbug on Blogspot, it ate my comment. To sum it up, the same thing happened on today's field trip to Lao Shan, and Angela beautifully deflected it by offering to take the students' place and pose with the (as you mentioned) surprised and confused grandchild, and eventually turned the whole concept around by asking a Chinese couple in matching outfits (who were minding their own business and just taking photos of each other) to let her take a photo with them :D

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