Perfect Timing


One week from today it’s going to happen.  My baby will turn 1.  I can’t believe it has been a year since I sat in that hospital bed, and waited, and waited and then he came.  If you followed my pregnancy at all then you know how stressful it was with the mystery problems and crazy treatment ideas from the doctor.  Up until the day that Oliver was born we just didn’t know what to expect.  We could only pray and wait.  And then they day came, and into the world he came, all 4 pounds of tiny perfection. 

Over the past few weeks I have been pondering why everything happened the way that it did.  Of course I won’t know for sure until I see God someday face to face and can ask all of my questions.  But looking back I am amazed already.  I had always wanted to have a few children, 4 at the least, 6 at the most.  But after I had Maddie, no more came.  We waited, and prayed, and waited some more.  I never miscarried, but I also never got pregnant again.  There was nothing wrong so there was nothing to do but wait.  Finally I got tired waiting and worn out from asking, and told Rob that I needed to accept that it simply wasn’t in God’s plan for us. 

Then one day, I was pregnant.  It took me a while to realize that what I was experiencing wasn’t jet-lag or a stomach bug, but was actually morning sickness.  It was a rocky nine months, but in the end I held in my arms this tiny perfect little baby boy.  And over the course of this year I have come to realize he was also born at the perfect time. 

2015 was a hard year for our family.  In our personal lives we experienced a lot of moments that left our hearts heavy.  The vast majority of people that we had come to care for and invest in here in our China home, moved away, both foreigners and Chinese, family and friends.  People we trusted deeply disappointed us.  All 4 of us have shed our fair share of tears this year.  But through it all there has been one consistent bright spot, a reason to laugh every day even if it was a hard day:  that is Oliver.  He delights us daily with his silly faces, baby noises, and simple but profound accomplishments.  The joy that a baby brings is matched by nothing else.  And we have needed that joy this year.  We have needed the reminder to laugh and the release of tension that is brought by making silly faces at a baby. 

All those years when I couldn’t imagine why God was saying no, again and again and again, and he was really just saying wait.  Wait until the right time.  He was saving our Oliver for the time when we needed him most.  We would always have loved Oliver, no matter when he came to join us.  But having him at this time, in this season, has brought healing to our hurt and soothed our ache.   2015 was a hard year, but we can’t ever say it wasn’t a good year, because it brought Oliver into our lives, and that is a blessing we can’t overlook. 

Thinking through all of that, and recognizing the perfect timing of Oliver’s arrival, has brought with it a much needed reminder:  God is good all the time, and His plan for my life is perfectly organized and incredibly loving.  So 2015 with all of its challenges and heartache, wasn’t a year that God forgot us, on the contrary it was a year that He planned specifically for us.  And in foreseeing the difficulty He also provided for our joy by giving us Oliver.   That realization brings me hope for the future and confidence in the fact that we can trust His plan for our family.  Although we can’t see what is coming next, and although it will surely involve some hard times, it will also surely involve good times.  And whatever it is will be His best for us. 


So, Happy Birthday my sweet Oliver.  We are so blessed to have you.  You bring us so much joy and remind us of God’s love.  We can’t wait to celebrate you this next weekend!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Identity

Image
This study of John continues to totally captivate my attention. Most recently one of the things that came out of our study was identity. Jesus repeatedly identifies himself in John; I am: the bread of life, the light of the world, the living water, the way, the truth, the life.   So who am I? A wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, an auntie, a nurse, a teacher.........and on goes the list. But none of those are really me. Those are relationships that I have, or things that I do, but they aren’t me.   I spend a lot of time talking to young people and their parents who are trying to identify who they are. So often the discussion is based around the building of a college application. My child is an athlete, an artist, a musician, a linguist, a maths genius........ Then there are the national identities, and the passport identities, and the religious identities. My child is an A student, a C student. And from the children: I am an academic s...
Read more

Not forgotten

Image
It’s easy to feel forgotten, overlooked, or abandoned in our heart of hearts. Sometimes small things make us feel that way: not being invited to the party or not being acknowledged for a job well done. Sometimes it is much bigger things: extended illness, infertility, or loosing a job. Beyond this exist even heavier things that we shy away from thinking about: poverty, the loss of a loved one or violence. Whether big or small, intentional or unintentional, inflicted by fellow man or allowed by God, these disappointments leave behind varying levels of deep and painful wounds that are often difficult for anyone else to see.  Our tendency is to guard these wounds carefully and to protect ourselves in any way possible from the pain that they bring. Simultaneously most of us still wish to be noticed and to be known, but our fear of letting down that guard and letting anyone close enough to see our quiet pain or worse touch the pain holds us back. As a result, no one really know...
Read more

The Fount of Every Blessing

My birthday has rolled around again (that happens so quickly these days J ).   Sometimes, I’m surprised by my own age, I’ll wake up some mornings and think I’m still in my 20’s only to jolt myself back to reality that more time has passed then I think.   We use our birthdays and anniversaries to mark the passage of time.   They call us to stop and remember what has happened since the last time we passed this way. And whether the memories are good or bad there is something in us that needs to recall, evaluate, and acknowledge what has transpired.   As I pass my milestone this year I am captivated by the words of a very old hymn penned in 1757 by Robert Robinson, “Come Thou Fount”.   “Come thou fount of every blessing tune my heart to sing thy grace.”   Looking back over my year and even farther past that into the years before, I find that my life is covered with evidences of God’s grace.   They are weaved into every portion of my existence and...
Read more