In the Bleak Midwinter
The weather outside is gray and cold. There is no sun. Even my house which is generally a bit hot, feels a chill today. These type of days make me reflective. They are always a bit dangerous for me. There is now no doubt that winter is upon us. We've had a solid week of cold and gray.
I talked to my parents, my grandmother, my sister & her husband today via Skype. It's a wonderful thing. I am so thankful that we have the ability to connect face to face in that way. It's a priceless gift when the distance separating you is so far. But today in all my melancholy, it just hurt. Sometimes the inability to really give a hug or to sit as one family without adjusting the screen or speech delays, or internet cutouts is tangibly painful. This will be my 3rd Christmas away from home, out of reach of my family, in a land that doesn't even know what Christmas is. There are no pretty houses decorated with lights, no Christmas music playing in the stores, no churches with nativity scenes, no Christmas trees in houses. Today I ache to be at my grandmother's house, with my mom in the kitchen, my dad watching John Wayne, and my husband and brother-in-law playing ping pong in the basement while my children running circles around everyone and my niece toddles after as fast as she can and my sister and I sit and laugh at it all. My son keeps asking, "Mommy when will we go to America, tomorrow?" and I don't have the heart to tell him it will be a very very long time away. I don't even have the heart to think about it myself. There is a deep longing in my heart to be with the people I love in the midst of familiar surroundings, where everyone knows what Christmas is.
We all experience that longing to different degrees, for different reasons. Some of us long because we desperately want a family and we don't have one, some of us long because we have one and can't be with them. We ache for desires unfulfilled, people we have lost, love we haven't found, problems too big to solve, separation from loved ones, sickness and pain. Sometimes we don't even know what we ache for, we just know the ache is there.
The beauty of this Advent season is the promise that the ache won't last forever. There is hope. Not a distant far off maybe kind of hope, but a stake your life on this because it's true kind of hope. The wrongs will be righted, the sick made whole, the tears wiped away. The groaning of this world will end in the glorious arrival of our king. He came the first time as a helpless baby born to pain and suffering and fulfilled promises so old that those who knew them best almost didn't believe them anymore. He will come the second time in power and glory to fulfill the rest of the promises. And all the aching and longing we feel here will be nothing compared to the joy and the peace that await us. So in this bleak midwinter with all of creation we feel that groaning and say, "O come of come Emmanuel" We will remember the first time HE came, and let it fill us with hope as we wait now for the final time.
Isaiah 11 "There shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse, and a branch from his roots shall bear fruit, and the spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of might and council, the spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord. He shall not judge by what his eyes see, or decide disputes by what his ears hear, but with righteousness he shall judge the poor and decide with equity for the meek of the earth, and he shall strike the earth with the rod of his mouth and with the breath of his lips he shall end the wicked. Righteousness will be the belt of his waist and faithfulness the belt of his loins. The wolf shall dwell with the lamb and the leopard shall lie down with the young goat, and the calf and the lion and the fatted calf together and a little child shall lead them."
I talked to my parents, my grandmother, my sister & her husband today via Skype. It's a wonderful thing. I am so thankful that we have the ability to connect face to face in that way. It's a priceless gift when the distance separating you is so far. But today in all my melancholy, it just hurt. Sometimes the inability to really give a hug or to sit as one family without adjusting the screen or speech delays, or internet cutouts is tangibly painful. This will be my 3rd Christmas away from home, out of reach of my family, in a land that doesn't even know what Christmas is. There are no pretty houses decorated with lights, no Christmas music playing in the stores, no churches with nativity scenes, no Christmas trees in houses. Today I ache to be at my grandmother's house, with my mom in the kitchen, my dad watching John Wayne, and my husband and brother-in-law playing ping pong in the basement while my children running circles around everyone and my niece toddles after as fast as she can and my sister and I sit and laugh at it all. My son keeps asking, "Mommy when will we go to America, tomorrow?" and I don't have the heart to tell him it will be a very very long time away. I don't even have the heart to think about it myself. There is a deep longing in my heart to be with the people I love in the midst of familiar surroundings, where everyone knows what Christmas is.
We all experience that longing to different degrees, for different reasons. Some of us long because we desperately want a family and we don't have one, some of us long because we have one and can't be with them. We ache for desires unfulfilled, people we have lost, love we haven't found, problems too big to solve, separation from loved ones, sickness and pain. Sometimes we don't even know what we ache for, we just know the ache is there.
The beauty of this Advent season is the promise that the ache won't last forever. There is hope. Not a distant far off maybe kind of hope, but a stake your life on this because it's true kind of hope. The wrongs will be righted, the sick made whole, the tears wiped away. The groaning of this world will end in the glorious arrival of our king. He came the first time as a helpless baby born to pain and suffering and fulfilled promises so old that those who knew them best almost didn't believe them anymore. He will come the second time in power and glory to fulfill the rest of the promises. And all the aching and longing we feel here will be nothing compared to the joy and the peace that await us. So in this bleak midwinter with all of creation we feel that groaning and say, "O come of come Emmanuel" We will remember the first time HE came, and let it fill us with hope as we wait now for the final time.
Isaiah 11 "There shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse, and a branch from his roots shall bear fruit, and the spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of might and council, the spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord. He shall not judge by what his eyes see, or decide disputes by what his ears hear, but with righteousness he shall judge the poor and decide with equity for the meek of the earth, and he shall strike the earth with the rod of his mouth and with the breath of his lips he shall end the wicked. Righteousness will be the belt of his waist and faithfulness the belt of his loins. The wolf shall dwell with the lamb and the leopard shall lie down with the young goat, and the calf and the lion and the fatted calf together and a little child shall lead them."
Comments
Post a Comment